


Heathens

by TheCookieMonster77



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Gen, IN SPACE, Yes Really, also, non-binary characters, pineapple pizza discourse, saving the universe is stressful so they gotta be ridiculous to make up for it, season 1 characterizations, specifically keith and pidge, they're all idiot nerds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-20
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-11-01 10:39:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10920150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheCookieMonster77/pseuds/TheCookieMonster77
Summary: "You…"Keith looked completely bewildered and lost at Lance's outburst and Lance thought that that was probably the worst part of all of this. The heathen didn't even realize his error.Keith's face looked startlingly close to a kicked puppy. "What did I do?""I- You-" Lance let out a muffled shriek shout of irritation. "You," he growled, jaw clenched and teeth grinding, "just asked for pineapple. On pizza."What. An. Out. Rage.Keith blinked. "...Yes?"Hunk is an amazing angel (like always) who figured out how to make space pizza. Lance was ready to sing his praises to the universe, but then his teammates have to go ruin everything by insisting on pineapple pizza.Heathens.





	Heathens

This was an _outrage_.

"You _what?!_ "

Keith blinked at him, his face falling into his regular you're-being-weird-again-Lance-and-I-understand-nothing expression. The fact that he even had that expression at all and that Lance could recognize it so well really said something about their relationship and _wow_ , that was actually pretty offensi- _dammit McClain focus_.

Lance, Hunk, and Keith were lounging on the couches in the commonplace area, debating what to do with the odd cheese-like substance Keith had found on the last hub station Team Voltron had infiltrated. It was lucky chance Keith had found the cheese at all- he and Lance had actually snuck off to scour the market for gifts for Hunk's upcoming birthday when Lance had accidentally hip-checked Keith too hard and sent him stumbling - literally - into a dairy stand. They had then both had various samples shoved under their noses until Keith bought a roll to satisfy the grumpy vendor, which he later gifted to Hunk after they got back to the castle and suffered through Allura's scolding.

Getting grounded by Allura aside, both Lance and Keith silently agreed that the endeavor was well worth it from the way Hunk's eyes lit up when he tasted the space cheese and started rattling off dish possibilities. Hunk was hunkering for pizza ( _god_ , Lance's mouth watered at just the thought of it) so now they were scrolling through the castle's food inventory looking for pizza ingredient substitutes.

Hunk, being the amazing angel and gift to mankind he always was, claimed to be eighty-three percent sure he could pull off space pizza.

Lance just might kiss him if he does.

But then mid Hunk praise session, Keith had to open his stupid mouth and ruin everything.

"You…"

Keith looked completely bewildered and lost at Lance's outburst and Lance thought that that was probably the worst part of all of this. The heathen didn't even realize his error.

Keith's face looked startlingly close to a kicked puppy. "What did I do?"

"I- You-" Lance let out a muffled shriek shout of irritation. "You," he growled, jaw clenched and teeth grinding, "just asked for pineapple. On _pizza_."

What. An. Out. Rage.

Keith blinked. "...Yes?"

Lance groaned. "You don't even see what's wrong with that! The desert must have muddled your brain, all that loneliness and dust deluding you into thinking _pineapple_ _pizza_ is good." Lance scowled to match Keith's growing frown. "Come on Hunk, back me up here."

Silence.

Lance whipped his head around, his jaw dropping as he came face-to-face with Hunk's disappointed look. " _Hunk?_ "

Hunk, the traitor, merely raised an eyebrow (which, by the way, that judging look was totally uncalled for, _Lance_ wasn't the godless heathen around here). "You know I'm Hawaiian Lance. I grew up on pineapple pizza."

" _So?!_ " Lance flapped his arms as he jumped up, stamping his foot so Hunk could feel the full force of this betrayal. "I grew up on the coast but that doesn't mean I'm some-some _boor_ who thinks fruit should _ever_ be on pizza!"

"You know tomatoes are fruit, right?"

"Anddddd-" Lance bowled on, ignoring Hunk's and Keith's growing amusement- "while I know you're a pure cinnamon roll who's far too good for this w- er, spaceship, I _cannot_ ," Lance emphasized, stamping his foot dramatically, "believe even you would claim _pineapple_ _pizza_ _is_ _good!_ "

Hunk's lips curled in amusement, his expression bordering on patronizing as he and Keith exchanged conspiratorial looks (jerks). "How can you hate something that's like sunshine and puppies Lance?"

Lance is not proud of the pained whimper he made.

Keith snickered.

"Shut your quiznacks," Lance snapped as Hunk leaned towards Keith.

"Sunshine and puppies," Hunk reminded, cutting off Keith's retort by bumping his shoulder against Keith's and dragging a computer over their laps. "So, where do you think we can get space pineapple?"

Lance whined and scrambled out of the room. What a bunch of _weirdos_.

 

* * *

 

"...Why isn't this working?" Pidge demanded, frustration lacing their tone as they pulled their lion closer to Shiro's.

The team was training with their lions, figuring they might as well make use of their free time as Allura and Coran ran diagnostics on the castle defences and tried to do something about improving the castle's particle barrier. (Honestly, Lance has had _beer_ stronger than that thing, how the hell has the castle not been shot down yet?)

(Not that he was, er, complaining. But still!)

"We've formed Voltron a million times before, what's different?"

The planet Allura and Coran decided to stop on was good for training. Rich soil plains stretched out for miles and they provided a wonderful open training ground for ginormous robots to romp around in. Sparkling pink lakes dotted the dark ground, many shimmering as they drained into the new craters and rivers the team had created during the hours they practiced solo flying. The bone white ruins atop the distant hills suggested that any civilization that might have lived there had long since passed, though the team kept far away from the dark green forests skirting the soil fields incase people and animals were still around.

"I don't k- Lance are you there? Lance?"

Speaking of the team, Lance still couldn't believe it had two _traitors_ in its midst. He had thought Keith was a pretty awesome guy, albeit not always good with Lance's jokes. Especially since between Lance's playful goading and Hunk's cheerful humor, Keith's natural mischievousness came out more often and the three could spend hours goofing off together. And then there was Hunk, the guy he'd been attached at the hip with since he was eight- his soulmate, his best bro for life, the whole shebang.

And then Keith had to go and _ruin it_ , exposing him and Hunk as heathenous pineapple pizza lovers. Which was actually kinda odd, how had he not known Hunk liked that junk?

_Maybe Keith is secretly a wizard? A nasty magical wizard who corrupts taste buds and foods and the foundations of the uni-_

"Lance!"

Lance startled, jerking away from his musings to finally register the conversation that he had unintentionally ignored. Shiro had opened a direct feed, his concerned face looking down from Lance's dash. Lance smiled sheepishly. "Sorry Shiro."

Shiro waved it away with a gentle shake of his head. "You okay? We've been flying in formation for about five minutes with no luck. Do we need to take a quick break?"

Lance's stomach curled with warmth at Shiro's concern and the team's murmured encouragement over the comms. He spared a moment to thank God for giving him such a wonderful group of friends who cared for him so much.

They were gonna be pissed when they learned why he wasn't focusing properly.

Something must've shown on his face because Shiro adopted his Dad™ face. "Lance…"

_Aw crap, he's using the Dad Tone™ too._

Shiro huffed.

Lance cracked. "IT'S KEITH'S FAULT."

Red swerved violently, the whole formation breaking momentarily before falling back together. Keith's shocked face popped up next to Shiro's on his dash. "WHAT?"

Lance stuck his tongue out at Keith (screw maturity). "I _cannot_ form Voltron with heathens who think pineapple pizza is acceptable."

The comm crackled. "Keith likes pineapple on pizza?" Pidge asked incredulously, drowning out Keith's protests that Hunk liked it too.

"RIGHT?!" " _OI_ IT'S DELICIOUS!"

Shiro's sigh cut off the bickering. (Okay but seriously, how did Shiro make even that sound like a disapproving father noise?)

"We can't form Voltron. Because you don't like pineapple. On pizza."

"Exactly!" Lance wrinkled his nose at Keith's and Hunk's protests. Keith's face was still on his monitor, his cheeks puffed out in a moody pout.

"Lance-"

"Just make them admit pineapple pizza is gross!" Lance stuck his nose up at Keith, who's pout deepened and started morphing into his kicked puppy look. "And we'll be fine."

"But I _like_ pineapple pizza."

This time, Blue nose dived out of the formation.

"WHAT?!"

Keith's pout broke and he smiled smugly, eyes crinkling. Lance stuck his tongue out at him again and hung up on his dumb face before whirling around to stare down a bemused Shiro.

"Da _aad_ ," Lance groaned, scandalized.

Shiro's lips twitched upwards. "What's the matter Lance?"

"Don't sound so patronizing," Lance snapped, valiantly ignoring his other teammates' laughing and teasing over the comms. "Keith is dumb and likes mullets and still has desert brain- _hush Keith-_ so fine whatever, pineapple pizza fits his weird tastes."

"Lance-" Hunk warned.

Lance bowled over Hunk. "Hunk grew up on the beach and opens his blessed heart to all types of food even when he shouldn't and I haven't quite ruled out Keith bewitching him so fine whatever, apparently my best friend loves pineapple pizza too." Lance ignored Hunk's and Keith's protests and focused back on Shiro. "But you…"

Lance gave Shiro his best hurt puppy/betrayed look. "How could _you_ betray me like this?"

Shiro had the audacity to look _amused_. "Because pineapple pizza is sweet and savory and it's delicious?"

Keith let out a triumphant, "HAH!" at Lance's pained groans. Lance called him directly just so he could hang up on his stupid smug face.

At least Pidge was still on his side.

 

* * *

 

Correction: Pidge was not on Lance's side.

Lance was feeling so attacked right now.

They were in Green's bay area, Pidge attached to their computer with all sorts of gadgets scattered around them and Lance pacing by the door where he couldn't accidentally break something and die via smol angry birb. He had gone to the _one_ paladin who seemed to hold a smidge of common sense, only for them to turn their back on him in his time of need.

The green paladin didn't even move away from their computer as they rolled their eyes when he told them such.

Well, he thought they rolled their eyes. Pidge has this amazing ability to exude sarcasm without actually doing anything. He was pretty sure they were…

"Are you rolling your eyes at me?"

"You're so dramatic," they huffed.

Yup, they were.

Pidge's sarcastic aura thickened ( _rude_ ). "What's the big deal?" they asked, their tone dryer than the desert. "It's just pizza."

Lance sputtered, his pacing turning to stomping. "Is _not_."

" _Really_."

"I do not appreciate your tone young newt," Lance said primly in his best Big Brother voice, smoothly dropping into a crouch so Pidge's bayard flew over his head instead of through it. "It's pineapple. On _pizza_. Why doesn't anyone see how wrong this is!"

"I think _anything_ on pizza is gross," Pidge corrected. Their bayard's blade retracted and settled with a smooth click that sounded suspiciously like 'damn it'. "At least pineapple is easy to pick off."

Lance blinked, his foot in the air, frozen mid stomp. "I'm going to forget that you just dissed combo and meat lovers pizza-"

Pidge gagged, their fingers blurring as they took their irritation out on their keyboard. " _Ugh_ those ones are even _worse_ -"

"WHAT!"

"-You loose _all_ the cheese trying to fix those pizzas-"

Lance sputtered and nearly stomped over before remembering all of Pidge's toys dotting the floor nearby them. He scrambled back from the minefield, his cries of injustice going ignored as the green paladin ranted.

"-and the flavor gets _everywhere_ so you're left with gross tasting tomato bread-"

Lance growled, self-preservation dying in the face of his need to defend his beloved pizza. "I _refuse_ to listen to such blasphemy, how _could_ you-"

"-Who even likes gross tomato bread besides old people like Shiro? _I_ sure don't, _I_ just want my delicious cheese pizza-"

"Nope nope no nonono _no_ I refuse to hear another word!" Lance clapped his hands over his ears and stomped out, which still didn't deter Pidge.

"-and if I'm stuck fixing my pizza it _better_ be an easy fix-"

"We're finishing this conversation later young newt!" Lance slammed his hand on the keypad, frustration growing as the doors slid shut softly and killed his dramatic exit. At least Pidge's bayard hit the other side with a loud _clang_ soon after the doors had shut. Not that it really helped Lance's tantrum as he stormed down the hall.

_I am surrounded by_ _ **heathens**_.

 

* * *

 

To the surprise of exactly no one, Lance ended up ranting to Coran next during castle cleaning rounds. They were in the main hall, white walls stretching far above head and blue lights flickering softly. Lance pouted at the top of the stairs, sitting on the steps and half heartedly whacking the rails with his rag as he wailed his misery to Coran as the older man started his cleaning at the foot of the stairs. Lance felt a little guilty dumping this on Coran, but the man did love it when Lance came to him for help, though Lance wasn't sure Coran would be any help against the heathens. But at the very least, Coran was a wonderful sympathetic ear.

"...What exactly is the problem?"

Lance took back everything nice he's ever said about Coran. "It's _pineapple!_ On _pizza!_ "

It was official: Lance was a broken record. A sole voice of reason in an environment stuffed full of cavemen who simply could not comprehend how utterly _wrong_ pineapple pizza was.

Coran blinked and cocked his head. "What's a pineapple?"

_Oh_. Maybe there was still hope after all.

Lance pursued his lips. "Well, it's a type of fruit. Citrusy. Sweet. Juicy." Lance frowned. Why was describing fruit so _hard?_ Hunk could probably do this better and had his angelic friend not turned out to be a traitorous pineapple pizza lover in disguise, he'd have been dragging Coran to him now. "Uh, tropical? I dunno. It's pineapple. Which does _not_ belong on pizza."

Coran hummed as he scrubbed a banister. "Sounds kinda like a Corlusian berry to me. Don't know where you'd get some of those though. The Corlusa system was probably taken over pretty early, they're right by the Galra Empire's capital. And Corlusian berries don't just grow anywhere!"

Lance _hmph_ ed and attacked a stain with renewed vigor. " _Good_ , otherwise those horrible traitors would ruin the pizza."

Coran chuckled and stroked his mustache thoughtfully. "You know, you're awfully bent out of shape for a type of pizza Hunk probably won't be able to make."

Lance sighed wearily, cloth fibers tearing away as Lance scrubbed the banister viciously. "That's not the point Coran. It's the _principle_ of the matter."

Coran snorted and dropped the matter, dragging a groaning Lance onto the next place in need of cleaning.

 

* * *

 

When all hope seemed lost, the one and only Princess Allura, light of his life and savior of the universe, stood by Lance's side.

Horror was still stamped across her face as she stared across the common room at Hunk, Shiro, and Keith. "You would eat-" her nose scrunched up and she turned visibly green- " _Corlusian berries_ on pizza?!"

Lance wiped away a few tears and resisted the urge to fall to Allura's feet. " _Finally_ , someone who sees the light!" Lance sniffed reverently. "My _hero!_ "

Hunk frowned, his lower lip pushing out as he turned his puppy eyes on Allura.

(Lance mildly feared for his cause. Hunk's puppy eyes could stop whole Galra fleets, though Lance was sure Allura was stronger still.)

"But…" Hunk trailed off, his brow puckering and his left eyebrow twitching like it always did as he shuffled through his eidetic memory. "I thought Alteans didn't have pizza?"

Allura was scoffing before he could even finish his sentence. "So? It has _Corlusian berries_." Allura gagged. " _Anything_ that contains Corlusian berries is ruined by default."

"Oh come on, you're stupid to say that without trying it first!" Keith protested.

Silence descended, the room becoming ten degrees cooler with every millimeter Allura's eyebrow rose.

Lance had to admit that while Keith was a stupid _moron_ , at least he was a brave one.

Keith appeared to have caught onto his mistake as well (Lance doubted that even social ineptitude could have excused Keith from the Princess's disapproval), color draining from his face and his feet shifting as though he might be able to turn tail and outrun his words. With a gulp he resigned to his fate, Shiro patting his shoulder farewell and Hunk wincing sympathetically.

_R.I.P. Keith, may you find happiness and better taste buds in your next life_.

"It. Has. Corlusian. Berries." Allura's face scrunched, looking like she had just been forced to eat ten lemons. " _Disgusting_."

And with that steely pronouncement, Allura swept out of the room with a regal sniff.

Keith wobbled, relief sweeping across his face, and he slumped like a puppet that had its strings cut. Shiro caught him before he could collapse completely and Hunk supported Keith's other side as Keith undoubtedly finished watching his life flash before his eyes.

"Keith," Pidge said slowly, "I have seen you do many stupid and rash things before, but that was definitely the worst."

Shiro and Hunk set Keith down on the couch and Keith slumped bonelessly. "I-I…" _Gulp_. " _Shiro_ why didn't you stop me? I nearly _died_."

Shiro arched his eyebrow with a wry smile. "The day I'm able to reign the lot of you in is the day my hair stops going gray." Shiro paused, blinked, and turned to Pidge. "That makes me sound old, doesn't it?"

Pidge waved his concern away, already flipped upside down on the couch and wriggling their toes in the air as they stretched out their legs. "No worries Shiro, your hair's already white. We all know you're ancient."

" _Hey!_ "

Shiro's protests were cut off when Lance's finally couldn't contain his joy anymore, his victory bursting out of him in a loud cheer as he started dancing around the common room.

Keith jerked upright so he could stare around Hunk and follow Lance's dance around the room. "Why are you cheering?!" Keith demanded, his face drooping. "Hunk, why is he happy? I nearly died! Why-"

Shiro pinched his brow and sighed loudly. Keith's rambling abruptly caught off in the face of Shiro's why-are-you-kids-ruining-what's-left-of-my-luscious-locks sigh but Lance only mildly toned down his cheering. (It was a time for celebration dammit!)

"Lance, what're you doing?"

"Yeah." Hunk's lower lip came out in a pout. "Why are you doing your victory dance? You haven't won anything?"

That got Lance to stop. He whirled around to face his fellow paladins. Shiro and Hunk were still clustered around Keith on the couch, the three staring at Lance with varying levels of uncertainty. Even Pidge, who was on the other end of the couch from Keith, looked up in the silence to stare at Lance.

"Are you _kidding_ me?" Lance stared at their blank faces and a smug smile started to pull at his lips. "Hah! You guys haven't even realized yet."

"Realized _what?_ " Pidge snapped as Lance strutted across the room to plop down next to them.

" _We_ won."

Lance settled back with his hands behind his head, his smug grin on full force as he awaited the cheers of victory and despair.

Four blinks. "Huh?"

Lance's grin abruptly turned down in a pout. _Do I have to spell everything out?_

"Hell-o? The Battle of the Pizza?" Lance squinted at the three pineapple pizza loving heathens. "You know, your refusal to admit that fruit on pizza is just as wrong as peanut butter on ramen."

Pidge snorted. "Oh this again?"

Lance gasped and whirled around on his supposed ally. " _Oi_ you're supposed to be on the right side."

Pidge poked Lance's side, right in the ticklish spot between his ribs. "I'm on no one's sides."

Another one of Shiro's sighs cut over Hunk's and Keith's "yeah!"s. "What sides, Lance? We're a team, there are no sides."

Lance held up his hand before Shiro had even finished his sentence. "Space Dad, I respect your authority to be Right On All Things, but on this you go too far. I simply _cannot_ be on a team with people who claim pineapple pizza is good."

Shiro facepalmed. Lance blinked, giddiness rising, because Shiro just honest to God smacked his face in exasperation, the loud _smack_ ringing around the room.

_No way, I thought people only did that in cartoons! I deserve a medal_.

Hunk cautiously poked Shiro's shoulder before shooting Lance a disappointed look. "I think you broke Shiro."

Pidge elbowed Lance.

Keith's head popped around Shiro's other side and he glared at Lance. "Lance," he growled, "Allura told us we weren't allowed to do that anymore!" His eyes flicked to Shiro, who was taking deep breaths and probably contemplating if he could salvage his sanity by leaving now or if it was already too late. "We're already grounded, do you _want_ to risk her wrath?"

Lance blew a raspberry. " _Pfft_ , I doubt Allura will kill me now that she knows I'm the only reasonable one out of all of us." Lance snapped a finger gun at him and winked. "Winners don't kill their fellow winner, Keith."

Keith threw his hands up, exasperated. "You couldn't have won! Even with Allura, it's still three-two."

Lance snorted, making everyone reel back in surprise (even Shiro looked up at that one, Lance proudly noting that the man looked more exasperated than dying). "Exactly. I have _Allura_ on my side." Lance cackled as he leaned back with his hands behind his head. "She counts for like twenty of us, I win indefinitely!"

Keith nearly fell off the couch. Lance snickered and blew him a raspberry. " _What?"_

Shiro scratched his chin, looking rather thoughtful. "Well, Lance has a point there."

Keith sputtered, his brow drawing together and a flush rushing up his neck. Hunk pressed his lips together and patted him on the shoulder in consolation, his dark eyes glittering with amusement as they darted from Keith to Shiro to Lance and back again.

"But- I- _argh_." Keith bristled at Lance's cackle and defiantly crossed his arms. " _Fine_ , but we still have Shiro. So we're even."

Shiro frowned, still looking thoughtful. Lance valiantly ignored that in favor of scowling at Keith. "Does not! Allura counts for twenty, Shiro only counts for like. Six." Lance squinted at Shiro, humming as he looked Shiro up and down. " _Maybe_ six-point-five?"

" _No_ -"

"YES-"

Shiro groaned and looked to Hunk and then to Pidge. "Should I be offended?"

Pidge and Hunk waved him away with a vague "ehh" as Lance and Keith continued to bicker.

" _Obviously_ Shiro counts for _at least_ fifteen-"

" _No!_ Shiro is cool and was originally ten but anyone who's favorite pizza is _pineapple-_ "

"Enough!"

Keith and Lance instantly clamped their mouths shut and snapped to attention. They realized what they had done the instant Pidge and Hunk started laughing, giving each other sheepish smiles before turning to face Shiro. Shiro raised an eyebrow, the two boys shuffling nervously under the authoritative glare.

"This is ridiculous."

Both flinched. Lance smiled weakly as Keith hunched in on himself.

Shiro cocked a hip and arched an eyebrow, his eyes briefly darting from Lance and Keith to Pidge and Hunk, who were in silent hysterics. His lips twitched into a smile briefly before smoothing into his commander face as he focused back on Lance and Keith. "Look we don't have pineapple out here so there's no point in us fighting over it. _Lance_ ," Shiro warned before Lance could open him mouth, eyes narrowing.

Lance mimed zipping his mouth shut with wide eyes.

Shiro nodded approvingly. "Good. Obviously, Allura counts for more than all of us-"

"That's what I said!"

"Lance!" snapped Shiro, Lance miming zipping his mouth shut and locking it this time. Shiro's eyes darted to Keith, who wisely held up his hands in surrender under his glare. Shiro huffed, his eyes rolling his eyes up to the ceiling in a "why me?" sort of desperation, and put his hands on his hips as he turned back to Lance. "I have to admit though, Lance, I'm surprised you'd count me as ten."

Lance startled. "But-" He froze mid-protest and slammed his hands over his mouth.

Shiro snorted. "You said I was docked points because pineapple pizza is my favorite but seeing how it's not…"

Keith startled next to him. " _What?_ "

Shiro looked infinitely amused. "Nope."

Lance blinked, eyes darting between Shiro and a shocked Keith, and he whooped as the full weight of the confession hit him. "There's hope for you after all!"

Keith was still shell-shocked. "Wait what? But you- I-" Keith gaped at Shiro. "We grew up in the same house, how did I not know this?!"

Shiro grinned outright, reaching out and ruffling Keith's hair. He looked delighted when Keith jerked away and threw his arms over his head, pouting up at Shiro from beneath a fluffier mullet. "Just because I let you get pineapple pizza for pizza night every time doesn't mean it's my preferred one."

Lance cackled, petty enthusiasm rushing through him until he caught Keith's face. The poor guy looked like a puppy who had just accidentally broken something important in front of their owner.

_Could you not make me feel bad_ , Lance grumbled mentally, resisting the urge to poke at Keith until he was focused back on him and smil-er, not-looking-sad again. _I'm trying to be a smug asshole and you're ruining it_.

Hunk swallowed down his laugh and leaned towards Shiro eagerly. "So what is your favorite type of pizza?"

"Olive and pineapple pizza." Shiro sighed happily and licked his lips. "It's _amazing_."

_Wait._

"WHAT?" "THAT'S THE SAME THING!"

Lance made a loud noise of disgust and took three large steps back. "Just when I began to believe in you again."

Hunk hummed thoughtfully. "I've never tried that before, what's it like?"

Shiro grinned, bright and happy. "It's sweet and savory like regular pineapple pizza, but better balanced and saltier and _perfect_."

Hunk rubbed his hands together, tongue sticking out as his eyes got that dreamy look they always did when mentally trying new foods. "Oh it sounds delicious, I wanna try it."

" _Blech_ ," Keith groaned, shoulders slumped and tongue hanging out. " _Olives_. On _pizza?_ " He gagged and turned to Shiro and Hunk, incredulous. "Why would you ruin pineapple pizza like that?"

Lance snorted. "Pineapple pizza is already ruined, at least olives make sense."

Pidge snickered from behind Lance and poked his back. "Way to stick up for Shiro's side- don't get your nose too brown."

Lance flinched, horror stealing across his face as he realized he just stuck up for _pineapple pizza_ of all things. Granted it was pineapple _and olive_ pizza but they were basically the same thing!

Shiro beamed at him.

Lance flinched back, a hiss on his tongue. _Evil_...

Keith's gagging cut off Lance's horror. "Olives? _Olives?_ " He slumped, tongue hanging out of his mouth. "In what universe would anyone ever stick olives on pizza?"

Lance's jaw dropped, a minute of silence passing before he processed that statement well enough for his eyes to dart to the other paladins to confirm that they were all staring at Keith with varying levels of incredulity as well.

Keith stared back, his face flickering with confusion. "What?"

This time, Lance and the other three groaned in unison. Keith blinked, confusion stamped across his face, and he shuffled nervously under the matching incredulous stares. Lance took a deep breath and stepped forward, clapping Keith's shoulder. "Keith, my buddy, my garbage son-"

Keith reeled back, looking as though someone had asked him to swallow a fish. "I'm not your son!"

Lance ignored him and squeezed his shoulder for emphasis. "-pizza is _Italian._ "

Keith blinked. "O-kay?"

Lance stared back at him expectantly for a seeming eternity before realizing Keith was still lost. Lance tried valiantly not to sigh and sound old like Shiro.

"Keith, my man, _buddy_ ," Lance licked his lips and leaned in conspiratorially. "That means olives are a traditional pizza topping."

Keith blinked, stone faced. Suddenly his facade cracked in horror and he stumbled back, tongue hanging out in disgust. " _Gross_ who the hell even likes olives at all these days?"

Shiro's grin slipped and he frowned. "Really?"

Keith shot Shiro a withering scowl, the perfect image of a disgruntled younger sibling. "You're old, your taste buds must've withered away."

Shiro threw his hands up. "Why do you lot keep mocking my age? I'm barely thirty! The peak of my youth, top of my game, the perfect age!"

The four kids blinked at him with deadpan looks in eerie synchronization. "Uh huh, sure Dad."

Shiro scowled. The kids blinked again before turning away, Lance and Keith picking up their bickering over proper pizza toppings. Pidge snickered, stretching out along the couch cushions and happily ignoring the chaos building around them.

Hunk patted Shiro's shoulder sympathetically. "Don't worry, it's just a dad friend perk. We mock your age out of love."

Shiro looked to the ceiling as though it held the answers to life's mysteries. "You know Hunk? Oddly enough, that's not really reassuring."

Hunk shrugged. "Eh, you're super tough for an old man, I'm sure you'll weather through a few more years." Hunk rubbed Shiro's shoulder as he dropped his head into his hands with a loud groan. "But nevermind that, I know just the thing to get your mind off your old age! I don't think olives are universal, come help me find Coran so we can ask him where we can get space olives."

"Hey Hunk…" Pidge called, feigning disinterest as they took up more couch space than they could feasibly fit across to settle into a nap. "Don't forget you're gonna have to convince Allura to let you make anything other than cheese pizza!" Pidge grinned slyly at Hunk through sleep heavy eyes. "And good luck doing _that_."

Hunk stiffened in the doorway, Shiro accidentally running into him and pushing Hunk forward another step with a loud _ooph_. Hunk flailed briefly before brushing off Shiro's apology and turning to Lance and Keith. "Lance, Keith, we have a mission!"

Lance and Keith froze mid-bicker, eyes wide as they turned to face Hunk. "Huh?"

 

* * *

 

"No."

Hunk whimpered, his lower lip sticking out and eyes watering into a perfect puppy dog look. "But Allur _a_ -"

Lance had been so wrong about Hunk. Hell, his entire life was a lie. His best friend wasn't angel, he was a devious devil in an adorable teddy bear disguise, using _evil_ puppy dog eyes to deceive Lance into betraying the very foundations of everything he believed in-

" _Please_ ," Hunk whined, hands clasped in front of him as he beseechingly gazed up to a stone faced Allura.

Hunk was currently pulling every trick in the book trying to convince Allura to let him make space pineapple and olive pizza. Lance wasn't sure why Hunk dragged him and Keith along for it ("For witnesses." "Witnesses to _what?_ "), but Lance wasn't even the recipient of Hunk's begging and he was already teetering on the edge of giving in and claiming pineapple pizza was a good thing.

_Thank goodness Allura is made of stronger stuff._

Allura raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "We don't even have the ingredients, why is this a debate?"

Hunk blinked innocently, his lower lip trembling. Lance's knees wobbled but Allura remained unconvinced still (Lance fervently thanked every deity he could think of for blessing him with Allura on his side). Hunk's pout deepened momentarily as he realized its uselessness and he dropped the sad look with a sigh. "Okay, but _when_ I find the ingredients, I want your permission beforehand so I can make it right away."

Allura's eyebrows were still by her hairline and she put her hands on her hips. "Your pizza requires a berry that can only be found in the heart of the Galra Empire."

Hunk stared. Blinked.

Allura leaned towards Hunk, face deadpan as he went cross-eyed to hold her gaze. "What makes you think you can get that before your "cheese" goes bad, hmm?"

Keith muttered a curse under his breath. Lance felt a rush of triumph and pride and he dug his elbow into Keith's side, right in the fleshy part of his waist underneath his binder, until Keith finally gave into the demand for attention. (Which admittedly only took about twelve seconds, but that was still five seconds longer than usual.)

(Shiro would be proud.)

Keith took one look at Lance's gloating face and promptly stomped on Lance's foot.

"OKAY SO-" Hunk protested over Lance's yelps and Keith's snickers. "Let's make a deal."

"Go on..." Allura said, her stone face finally cracking as her curiosity got the best of her.

Hunk grinned, the mischievous glint in his eye spelling doom. "My birthday's in a month-er, about two Altean mackas," he corrected when Allura looked confused. "So, if I can't find the berries and the space olives by then, we'll have regular old cheese pizza. _But_ …"

"If you find them, you get your nasty berry pizza," Allura finished, pursing her lips as she mulled over her options. "And what if I don't like the, er, what'd you call them? Ollies?"

"Olives?"

Allura nodded. "Yes those."

Hunk hummed. "I think you'd like them but incase you don't... _hmm_." Hunk squinted at Allura as she gave him an unimpressed stare. "What if I promise that I'll make you a mini cheese pizza with whatever's leftover if you don't like them?"

Allura looked appeased.

Doom spiked down Lance's spine.

"Deal," Allura said happily, shaking Hunk's hand before Lance could protest.

"Wait, _no!_ "

(Never let it be said Lance wasn't a trier.)

Allura cocked her head to the side, politely ignoring Hunk and Keith's triumphant cheers to pay attention to Lance. "What?"

Lance whimpered as Hunk and Keith put their heads together and started muttering rapidly, undoubtedly debating the best way to go about ruining the beloved space pizza. "Allur _a_ they're going to ruin the pizza!"

Allura snorted. "First they have to get a berry that can only be grown in an area exclusive to the heart of the Galra Empire, not to mention find goodness knows what else. And they only have about...what? Five or six aruvos to do it?"

Lance whined. "But they're determined! And they have Shiro!" Lance clasped Allura's hands and stared up at her beseechingly. "You know what a determined Shiro can do!"

Allura laughed. "Oh _please_ Lance. I doubt even Shiro is capable of pulling off something like that."

 

* * *

 

_Three weeks later._

"ALLURAAAAAAAAA," Lance whined as he barreled into the control room at full speed and dramatically threw himself at Allura's feet.

Allura blinked down, concern rushing over her face. "Are you alright?"

Lance whined pathetically. "They found space pineapple."

Allura blinked, brow crinkling. Just as she opened her mouth to ask Lance what the hell he was talking about, the other paladins walked in, Hunk's arms full with a large basket of purple berry bundles.

Allura's nose instantly wrinkled and she gagged. "You guys _found them?!_ "

Lance whimpered and curled into a ball at her feet. "I _told_ you not to underestimate a determined Shiro."

Shiro snorted as he filed into the room, arms laden with various grocery bags. "Turns out Corlusian berries are a rather popular treat with the Galra."

"Yeah Princess," Hunk continued as he shuffled his stuffed basket to better rest on his hip. "They made sure these babies could grow _anywhere_ and they're in all the markets." Hunk turned a bit sheepish and hunched his shoulders. "I mean, we had to search for three hours before we found any that were reasonably priced and we _might_ have accidentally stumbled across that station's black market and I think Keith joined an alien space gang, but-"

Shiro slapped a hand over Hunk's mouth as Allura's jaw dropped. Horror was stamped across her face as she stared at Hunk's basket in disbelief.

Lance sniffed and tugged Allura's skirt in a bid for attention. "Who cares about their stupid space adventures? They're going to ruin space pizza because they are horrible heathens with horrible tastes and _evil_ plans-"

Keith groaned and shot Lance a look that could peel paint. "What is it with you?! You're _still_ going on about that?"

Lance scowled at him, indignation rising in him with a haughty _hmph_. He turned his back on Keith and tugged Allura's skirt again. "Allur _a_ , don't let them ruin space pizza."

"Yeah, too late for that Lance." Hunk ignored Lance's whine and talked over him. "I have you and Keith as witnesses for when Allura told me I could make the pizza if I found the ingredients in time."

Allura looked rather impressed at Hunk's villainous plans and insurance. Lance pouted up at her in vain.

Allura did not look nearly as sympathetic as Lance thought she ought to be. "He's right Lance."

Lance sniffed and _thunk_ ed his head on the ground. "I hope you can hear the sound of my heart _shattering_ in the face of your cruelty, Allura."

"Oh hush you, you're a paladin. You'll survive."

Lance whined. "But it's _pineapple and olive pizza_."

Allura raised her eyebrows. "You guys found the olives too?"

Hunk grinned brightly. "Oh yeah, remind me to thank Coran for suggesting Borean brush nuts as an olive replacement." Hunk kissed his fingertips with a loud _mwa_ noise. "They're perfect. Actually…" Hunk hummed as he scanned the room. "Where are Coran and Pidge?"

Allura sighed, sounding rather put-upon.

Hunk's eyes widened. "Wait, they're not still working on the chameleon device are they?"

Allura nodded with a borderline scowl. "Yup. They can't seem to get it to wrap around the castle, apparently the shape is all wrong. Instead they keep making my control panel dis-"

The room's controls sparked and suddenly fizzled out of existence.

"-appear." Allura gestured at the newly missing panels with a flat look.

A comm crackled and Coran's voice rang through the room, excitement making it giddy. " _Princess! We think we-_ "

"My panel's gone again."

"... _quiznack_."

Hunk coughed. "Would you guys like some help?"

" _Hunk?_ " came Pidge's voice. " _Oh thank god,_ _ **finally**_ _! Get your genius butt down here before I blow this thing up."_

" _Now look here Number Five_ -"

"On my way!" Hunk called over Coran's lecture about the Proper Invention Method, Allura poking the air randomly as she tried to find the now invisible button. She finally hit it right as Coran started explaining why blowing up failed experiments was not a good cleaning method, and Coran's voice abruptly cut off with a soft _ding_.

Lance sighed. "Right as he was getting to the good part."

Hunk held out the basket of Corlusian berries to Keith. "Could you and Shiro take the stuff down to the kitchen for me? I'll put it away after I lend Coran and Pidge a hand."

"Sure," Keith said, right as Shiro held out his right hand and asked, "Would you like another one?"

Silence.

Space crickets chirped.

Lance rolled over, his face flat. "Shiro. You are the actual worst."

Shiro beamed, face alight with delight.

"Yeah man, I have to agree with Lance on this one." Hunk dumped his basket in Keith's arms and slapped Shiro's shoulder. "You have officially unlocked the fourth level of your Dad Status. Next thing you know, you'll be learning the right acronyms and discovering the beauty of caller ID."

Shiro's smile turned quizzical. "I thought that was a thing for old people back in the aughties?"

Lance snorted. "There's a difference with you?"

"Oh come _on_."

Keith shared an impressed look with Hunk, who then looked down at Lance with a suspiciously adoring mom expression. "I'm so proud of you man," Hunk said with a sniffle. "You've finally said something that's Pidge-level savage."

Lance sat up so he could mock bow. "Thank you, thank you." He held an invisible microphone and waggled his eyebrows. "I would like to dedicate this day to my old man Shiro and the Sass Monster in child-form known as Pidge-"

Shiro groaned loudly, eyes rolling heavenward (it was a miracle Shiro wasn't constantly dizzy with how much he did that). "I'm walking away now and then finding Pidge. You see, unlike _some_ ," he claimed with a pointed look at Lance, "they appreciate me and don't call me old and that's why they're my favorite."

Keith followed Shiro out, a small frown of confusion stamped on his face. "But Pidge calls you old more than all of us combined?"

Shiro's snort rang down the corridor as he and Keith disappeared into it. "Yes, but they're adorable and my favorite so it's okay."

Hunk's laughter drowned out Keith's protests as he turned to head down a different corridor. "Well then, I'm off to find Pidge and Coran."

"Don't forget to tell Pidge I'm up on their level now!"

Hunk paused in the archway with a thoughtful frown. "Welllll, scientifically speaking, if it only happens once it's just an anomaly." Hunk caught Lance's gasp and quickly gave him a reassuring a thumbs up. "I'll tell them anyways though."

Lance clutched his chest. " _Hunk_ , my buddy, my bro-"

Hunk waved cheerily at Lance and Allura. " _Bye_. Oh, and-" Hunk looked straight at Lance, a twinkle sparkling in his eye. "Thanks Allura!"

Lance gaped as Hunk disappeared with a chuckle, falling back with a loud groan to pout up at Allura. "I can't _believe_ I almost forgot about that." Lance sniffed loudly. "That beautiful space pizza is going to be r _uined_. _Ruined_ I tell you!"

Allura's eyes crinkled in a smile as she squatted down next to him and patted his head. "I'll be honest; you guys do a great job defending the universe. Then you have arguments like these that make me question everything."

Lance gaped up at Allura, pride and indignation warring in his gut. "One, _rude_. Two…" Lance clasped his hands with a loud gasp and stared up at Allura with large star eyes. "You're catching on to Earth sayings! That one was almost perfect! I'm so proud of you!"

Allura preened. "Thank you, I've been practicing."

"You should've said it when the others were here so they could appreciate it too."

Allura hummed and bounced the thought around her head, lips pursed. "Nah, I think I'm going to wait until I'm really good at them." She snapped her fingers so they made two finger pistols and winked. "Maximum savage that way."

Lance frowned.

Allura caught the look and smiled sheepishly. "I just used that incorrectly, didn't I?"

Lance held up his hand, thumb and forefinger close together, and grimaced. "Liiiiiiiittle bit."

"Phooey," Allura muttered with a snap of her fingers.

Lance shrugged. Allura stayed hovering over him, though her gaze was trained on a wall as she got lost in thought. Lance poked her shin, a move that would probably startle most people into falling on their butts but only made Allura lazily drag her eyes back to him.

"Yes Lance?"

Lance stuck his lower lip out in a sad, soulful pout. "You shouldn't have let Hunk talk you into his nasty pizza." Lance sighed. "You were my last defense against them…"

Allura snorted and flicked Lance's nose, outright laughing as Lance batted her hand away. "You should've protested Hunk's begging better. I'm still getting my own pizza out of this, I was set either way."

Lance gasped dramatically. " _Allura_ , if I wasn't already on the floor I would've fallen. How _could_ you abandon me so?"

Allura's eyes sparkled merrily. "We all gotta pick our battles Lance."

Lance bit his tongue before he said something stupid about the irony of _Allura_ saying that unironically.

_Where's Keith and his hot head when you need them?_

Allura's eyebrow arched and Lance very seriously considered the fact that the princess might be telepathic. Her lips twitched and Allura poked his forehead.

_Called it_.

"Lance sweetie," Allura drawled, her hands sliding to her thighs. "You need to calm down before you alienate your friends. It's just pizza."

Lance wrinkled his nose. "I know."

Allura smiled as she stood. "Good. Now Hunk said he was gonna make the pizza for his birthday party so-"

Lance's snort interrupted her. "He's just doing it then because he knows I'll do anything for him on his birthday." Lance wrinkled his nose. "Even eating _that_."

Allura raised an eyebrow. "You'd do anything for him on any day."

"Yes, but now I have to be _nice_ about it," Lance pouted.

Allura's laughter echoed off the walls.

 

* * *

 

On the much anticipated and awaited day of Hunk's birthday, Allura, Lance, Keith, and Pidge were found in the dining room putting the final touches to the party decorations.

Allura surveyed the room with a proud grin, a stray stripe of glitter on her cheek and confetti in her hair. "I think we did a marvelous job!" she said, hands on her hips and satisfaction oozing. She turned to the other three, eyes sparkling. "What do you think?"

Lance glanced around the dining room. The usually tidy room looked like Party City had puked up it's guts and no one bothered to clean it up. Streamers were haphazardly strung across the room, starting just above the regular lights and going all the way up to the tall ceiling. According to Lance, it looked like the universe's most colorfully and drunkenly constructed spiderweb. Bright paper lanterns randomly dotted the web, making colorful star bursts along the walls and lit up the multitude of glitter laden banners draped everywhere. Random bits of confetti dotted the couches and floors, and Lance was stunned the table wasn't groaning under the piles of junk food and party hats and presents they had all hoarded away for this occasion.

In all honestly, it was a mess. Which was something Lance probably should've expected when they told Allura how humans celebrated surviving another year and she latched onto the idea like a particularly excited leech.

It was crazy and over the top and _wonderful_.

Lance beamed at Allura. "I love it."

Allura tossed her hair over her shoulder with a satisfied but proud grin.

Keith grimaced. "It's kinda-"

Allura turned to him with an anticipatory grin, a slight manic gleam in her eyes.

" _Perfect!_ " Keith squeaked.

Pidge and Lance snickered. Allura didn't notice and beamed at Keith before bouncing over to correct a crooked banner.

Pidge coughed. "Suck up," they muttered.

Keith shot them an alarmed look and his eyes darted towards Allura frantically. " _Shh_ I'm trying not to die!"

Lance cooed and Pidge blew some confetti on him. "Look at you learning from your past mistakes."

"I try," Keith muttered dryly, all three snapping to attention when Allura asked if the banner was level.

Allura fretted over the decorations for several minutes, no matter how the three paladins tried to tell her everything was perfect. Just as Lance finished reassuring Allura that the banners were the straightest things in the room, Coran burst through the kitchen door with the most heavenly smell of melted cheese and toasted bread.

Coran stood tall and proud, his mustache quivering as he tried not to smile. "My dearest Lady and Gentlemen and Supreme Awesome Being," Coran announced like he was introducing a King. "Allow me to present the Birthday Boy!"

Hunk strutted in, a ratty old red tablecloth draped dramatically over his shoulders and his chin stuck up proudly. His wide grin grew as everyone whistled and hollered and he threw out his arms wide, laughing as everyone threw themselves at him in a big group hug.

A normal person would fall over when being glomped by three people and an excited Allura, but Hunk easily swept them all up into a big group hug. Lance let out a low _ooph_ as he got crushed between Allura and Hunk, Keith and Pidge getting squeezed together on his left.

"Thanks guys!" Hunk dropped them all to the ground, Lance and Keith discreetly taking a step back to rub their tender ribs. After a round of "Happy Birthday!"s and cheek kisses from all of them, Coran cleared his throat expectantly.

Coran stood off to the side, mustache quivering over his wide grin. Shiro stood next to him, two steaming plates carefully balanced on his hands. Shiro grinned brightly, hefting the two plates. "Let's eat!"

Lance took an alarmed step back. "Uh oh…"

Hunk sniffed and wrapped an arm around his neck. "Rude, I made this special today."

"Sorry buddy," Lance said as he patted Hunk's hand, "but I don't think even your magical cooking skills could make pizza blasphemy good."

Hunk shook his head, a tragic look painted across his face. "O' ye of little faith and bad taste buds."

"Oi!" Lance protested weakly as he let Hunk carry him to the table, lower lip stuck out in a fruitless pout. He was carefully dumped into the seat next to Hunk's carefully decorated throne, right in front of the ( _gorgeous, mouth watering, fantastic smelling_ ) offensive pizza, creamy pale cheese dotted with bleeding purple berries and bright green nuts oozing over the perfectly toasted crust. "That's Keith not me," he said contrarily even as he inhaled deeply and tried not to groan appreciatively.

Hunk hummed and rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Good point."

Lance froze over the awful ( _amazing_ ) looking pizza, eyes snapping open to meet a deer-eyed Keith. Both snapped towards Hunk. "What?"

Hunk patted the seat next to Lance's. "Get over here Keith, let's convert you over to my pineapple and olive pizza."

Keith frowned and didn't budge. "I never said your pizza was gross?" He crossed his arms defensively as his frown morphed into a pout.

"Actually," Shiro said cheerfully, blithely ignoring Keith's frantic _shut up!_ motions. "I told him how you asked me to trick him into only putting the Borean bush nuts onto one half of the pizza." Shiro snagged Keith to his side, his left arm seemingly loose around Keith's hunched shoulders. He started dragging Keith to the table with ease, despite the way Keith dug his heels into the ground hard enough to leave tread marks. "This is revenge."

"For _what?_ " Keith whined, squirming in Shiro's hold. "Don't betray me like this, we're flesh and blood-"

"You're adopted."

"-FLESH AND BLOOD-"

"Oh hush you," Allura said as she gracefully dropped down into the seat across from Lance and on the other side of Hunk's birthday throne. "You're acting so dramatic for a savior of the universe."

"Says the one who doesn't have to eat heathen pizza," Lance grumbled.

Allura glared at him. " _Hush_." She tossed her ponytail, gloriously thick and infused with glitter, over her shoulder with a regal sniff. "This is so undignified. You're doing this _for Hunk_."

Lance and Keith's protests both died with whimpers. Shiro dragged Keith - who was marginally struggling less than he was at first - the last few feet before shoving him into his seat. Hunk gleefully clapped his hands, enjoying the spectacle far too much ( _traitor_ ) and plopped down into his throne. He propped his chin up on his hands and beamed at Lance and Keith, feet happily tapping away as he nodded to the pizza.

"Time to eat!"

Lance eyed the deceptively delicious looking pizza. "Oh no buddy, this is _your_ special day-"

"Yup, that it is!" Keith said hastily, jumping onto Lance's plan immediately. "So really-"

"We couldn't _possibly-_ "

"Take away this great-"

"And majestic!"

"Moment from you-"

"So really buddy-"

"My pal-"

"Bro of my heart-"

"Eat the first slice!" they finished together. Lance gestured widely to the pizza, large smile splitting his face.

Keith added a weak _whoo_.

Hunk didn't move, eyes crinkled happily and feet still dancing away under the table. "Nah, it's fine! I _insist_ you two eat first. I want the full satisfaction of seeing you two discover the wonders of my pizza with no distractions."

Lance pouted and turned back to the pizza. "Ya should've _whoo_ ed harder my man."

Keith huffed and pulled out his knife. "Just shut up and take your pizza."

Lance raised his eyebrows as Keith cut himself a slice and speared it with his _battle_ knife. Keith raised the slice and then pointedly looked at Lance.

" _That_ ," Lance said with an exaggerated eyeroll and curled nose, "has got to be the most unsanitary and unnecessary thing I've ever seen." He picked up a ( _pre-cut_ ) slice and wrinkled his nose at Keith. "You _fight Galra_ with that thing."

Keith shrugged. "It's called living on the edge McClain."

" _Why are you like this?!_ "

"Laaaaance," Hunk drawled, effortlessly ending Keith's and Lance's bickering with a wide smile. His eyes shone with anticipation. "Shut up, I wanna know what you guys think of it!"

Lance opened his mouth without anything to say, jaw hanging down unattractively as his eyes darted between Hunk, the pizza, and Keith.

He met Keith's purple eyes and they both came to the same unspoken agreement-

_For Hunk-_

And bit into the pizza.

**Author's Note:**

> Hunk: eats pizza bc pizza is delicious and made of happiness. he prefers plain pineapple pizza to pizza and olive (sorry Shiro) but enjoys it all nevertheless
> 
> Shiro: finally gets the break he deserves and enjoys some amazing af pizza
> 
> Pidge: dumps all of their space toppings on Coran and eats their weight in cheesy goodness
> 
> Coran: eats all the toppings and gives the pizza parts to Pidge
> 
> Allura: talks Hunk into making all sorts of different pizzas so she can sample them all until she finds one she likes (space sausage and mushroom is the winner, Lance feels v vindicated) 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> yes, i am channeling spongebob rn, how kind of you to ask
> 
> anyways, tag yourself, I'm #teamHunk
> 
>  
> 
> [tumblr](http://thecookiemonster77.tumblr.com)


End file.
